This guy goes into a bar, sits down and asks for a whiskey. He's wearing a long coat with large pockets & looks a bit down on his luck.The bartender pours the drink & says "That'll be two dollars." Guy: "I don't have any money." Bartender: "Then you can't have any whskey." G: "Well, just a moment. I have something to show you that I think is worth the price of a drink." BT: "I doubt it, but whacha got?" The guy reaches into a pocket & pulls out a tiny grand piano & bench. He sets them on the bar, then reaches into another pocket and pulls out a large matchbox. Inside the matchbox is a parakeet of all things. He puts the bird on the bar. A few people notice & start to gather around. The guy says, "Rubenstein, play for these nice people. The parakeet walks to the bench, sits down & starts to play. He's great! He plays some Bach, some Chopin & some Mozart. The crowd loves it & breaks out in a big round of applause. BT: "I gotta admit, that's somethin. Here's your drink." Down it goes in one swallow. "Gimme another." BT: "Naw, I already heard your parakeet play." Guy: "Well, hold on, I've got something else to show you." Again, he reaches into a pocket & pulls out another matchbox. He opens it gently & inside is a mouse. He takes the mouse out, puts him on the bar & says: "Mario, sing for these nice people." The mouse walks over to the piano. He nods at the parakeet, which starts an introduction. The mouse starts to sing. He's absolutely incredible! He sings Figaro, He sings from Carmen, then the Barber of Seville & finishes up with some Gilbert & Sullivan. The crowd is going nuts! They've never seen anything like it. The bartender sighs and pours. Down it goes. G: "Gimme another." BT: "Sorry, I don't think so, unless ya got something else." Right about now, this other guy walks up. He's dressed to the nines & he's been sitting quietly back in a corner watching this whole thing go down. "I'm a talent agent. I've been watching your act & I'll buy it. I promse they will be well treated." They haggle a bit & negotiate a price. They make the transaction. The agent leaves with the piano, bench, parakeet & mouse. The guy buys a round for the house & finally things start to settle down. It's been quite an evening. Now the guy is sitting there having another drink & all of a sudden he starts to chuckle to himself. Then he starts to laugh out loud. Pretty soon it's all he can do to stay on his stool. BT: "What's so funny?" G: "Boy, did I ever rip that dude off." BT: "I think he got a pretty good deal. He'll be able to make a lot of money." G: "You don't understand. That mouse can't sing! The parakeet's really a ventriloquist!"